About a week ago I was at the local watering hole. I wanted to catch up with an old pal of mine and Teddy wanted to stay home so he could catch up on shows that I’d rather not watch so it was the perfect night for me to go.
I arrived and started chatting with my old pal….we had a couple drinks….and ate some cheese sticks…not on the wedding diet…GRRR! Then walks in our good friend Fred. Well that’s not exactly true as he’s not our friend but he’s the bars friend. If the structure could have friends it would be him….he is there pretty much all the time…and I’m sure at this point you’re saying well if you’re not there all the time then how do you know he’s there all the time…well smarty pants I don’t…but I’m assuming he is because every time I’m there…Fred is there.
Teddy and I like to pretend like we are Fred’s voice. Like he’ll walk up to the pool table and we’ll say “I’m gonna rack these balls and make some guy in here wish he knew how to play pool as great as me….I’m Fred The Great and this is my domain”. Or sometimes when Fred misses a ball and falls on his face at “his” pool table we’ll say stuff like “Whoa there cowboy! Who just hit me! I fell over!” Fred likes the whisky.
On this night I decided to give Fred a break. So instead of making up words for him I danced with him. Not with him but behind him. I was dancing behind his chair holding on to it but he had no idea I was there.
I’m dancing. Fred is oblivious.
Come to find out Fred wasn’t sitting in the chair he was just simply leaning on it with his backside….just sitting on the tip of the chair. So I lost my balance. Fred went flying forward with the chair and I went flying back on the ground. Luckily for me Fred just thought he had fallen over again on his own and the chair tumbled on top of him. I don’t even think he noticed me on the ground laughing so hard I couldn’t breath. Poor Fred. Poor tailbone. I need a chaperone.
Life is but a dream.